Now that we’ve got all the background out of the way, we can dive on in, right?! So my hope, right now, is to post weekly leading up to El Camino de Santiago and then hopefully (maybe because I’m super unreliable with things like this) I will post daily once en route?? Fingers crossed I actually make that happen.
As for Camino prep…I’ve actually got a lot done. Flights have been booked, trains have been figured out in regards to Maverick. Foreign countries have different rules and regulations regarding service dogs so we’ve had to ensure he is indeed able to travel around France and Spain which has been so, so much fun. At this point, I just want to be there already and deal with problems as they arise. I’m not great at planning ahead.
We still have a lot of supplies to get, though Maverick is definitely getting better equipped than I am. He now has a pack, a poncho, and booties which he looks adorable in and loves. (Only one of those statements is really accurate, I’ll leave it up to you to decide which.) And we’ve begun walking…a lot.
But this week was tough, I won’t lie. Like I mentioned in my previous post, I struggle with severe depression and anxiety and while I’d like to think I’m over it, that’s not the case. Some days are harder than others. Some weeks are harder than others. This week was one of those weeks. Lately, I’ve been walking anywhere from three to five miles a day with Maverick. This is no stretch for me as I’m used to walking plenty throughout the day but what I’ve found is it is a bit different to set aside some hours to simply walk. Not just rushing from place to place in every day life and racking up those steps.No, simply take time out of your day and walk for the sake of walking. It’s definitely different. It offers me a time to reflect, to talk with God, talk with my dog, laugh at his stupid antics. And the previous week I was loving it. This week, not so much.
As much as it seems awesome, how all you see of people are happy posts and new achievements…that’s not the reality. My reality is, sometimes, I don’t want to go on a five mile walk with Maverick. Sometimes, I can’t get the energy to find a reason to get out of bed. Sometimes, I make plans to go on some awesome adventure and take amazing pictures but when the time comes I can’t get myself to go. It’s easy to slap a happy inspirational quote on a gorgeous picture. It’s easy to tell the world you’ve got it all figured out and life is going great. The hard part is actually living.
I’m lucky. I’ve got an awesome support system around me. I’ve got a friend who drives miles with me to take pictures with me and my dog at a beach sunset. I’ve got a Mom who holds me when I break down and say I don’t want to be alive. I’ve got a Nana who goes out in the middle of a torrential downpour to pick flowers from her garden and then deliver them to me with a hug saying she wanted to “give me something to brighten up my mood”. I’ve got a dog who lets me spoon in him in bed but then also digs at me until I get up and take him on The Next Great Adventure. And that’s the thing…this life? Today? Tomorrow? It’s all The Next Great Adventure…as long as you’re willing to make it that.
-Colby
